If you read Pro Football Talk, follow them on Twitter, or just follow the Miami Dolphins in general, you may have seen this despicable story over the weekend. Ryan Tannehill, Miami Dolphins’ Quarterback, will be playing in a new offensive system this year under first year Head Coach Adam Gase. In a recent interview (just before a long Memorial Day Weekend), Tannehill had some choice words about the Dolphins’ new offense.
“We do a lot of things differently now,” Tannehill said. “Being on the line of scrimmage adjusting, whether it’s protections, routes, a whole new play — there’s a lot of freedom in what we do. I think it’s going to make us always on the attack. We’re not going to have to sit on our heels and feel like the defense is coming after us and we have to figure out a way to make it work. We can put pressure on the defense by getting in a good play and always keeping the heat on the defense.” – Pro Football Talk
Very interesting, Tannehill … Sure does seem to like freedom a lot huh?
“A lot of freedom in Adam Gase’s offense” , “There’s a lot of freedom in what we do.” etc. etc. – Ryan Tannehill
Clearly Tannehill appreciates his freedom. We’ve established that. And why shouldn’t he? Everyone loves freedom — Especially down in Miami nowadays because of something to do with Cuba that I don’t really understand and will not look any further into unless someone sends me the Cuba cliffs notes I requested on Twitter before I can finish this blog.
HOWEVER — can you believe that on MEMORIAL DAY WEEKEND, Ryan Tannehill has the Fucking nerve to thank the head coach of his SPORTS TEAM for giving him more FREEDOM. You know what else gives you a lot of FREEDOM Ryan? AMERICA. And NOT ONCE over this holiday weekend did he thank our troops for the freedom they’ve been providing him with since the day he was born. On Memorial Day Weekend nonetheless. On Memorial Day Weekend you either grill bratwursts in honor of our veterans, or you lock yourself in a dark room and appreciate the troops until Tuesday. No exceptions.
But he didn’t just stop there. Tannehill went on to say more about this “new found freedom” he’s had bestowed upon him by Adam “Here just have some Freedom for free” Gase.
“I think it’s going to make us always on the attack. We’re not going to have to sit on our heels and feel like the defense is coming after us … We can put pressure on the defense by getting in a good play and always keeping the heat on the defense” – Ryan Tannehill
What kind of outlandish political statement is Tannehill making here!? Is he saying that us Americans are just a bunch of pussies sitting back on our heels waiting to be attacked? What exactly are you accusing our troops of Ryan? Do you think the United States Military just sits around base camps all day playing Euchre? Well your FUCKING WRONG. Since you love the Adam Gase/Miami Dolphins’ version of freedom so much, why don’t you just go all the way with it and move your whole family to Cuba already. Clearly you don’t appreciate the freedom our American troops have provided you with in the United States — Maybe you’ll appreciate the freedom our American troops will provide you with in Cuba a little better (is that what’s happening in Cuba? I have no clue but I think that needed to be said either way).
I hate the New England Patriots more than most things in this world, but when they play the Dolphins this year — I hope that New England’s entire defensive line collectively drags their patriotic nut sacks across Ryan Tannehill’s face after every play and the Patriots win 1787-0.