Farewell to the Lady Ruthelen Hostel

In my last blog I discussed the Randy Marsh PF Chang’s sized piece of shit who stuck me with a +$200 parking ticket and fled town. But I’d like to give a final farewell to the Lady Ruthelen Hostel. I’m finally moving in to an apartment in Silver Lake, which is 100x nicer than South […]

WANTED: Colossal Piece of Shit

DISCLAIMER: This is a vengeful blog. It’s also sarcastic. Don’t get me wrong I’m fucking livid. But I would never actually want to cause harm to this man. Well that’s not true. I do want to cause physical harm. But 1) I’m a law abiding citizen (for the most part), and 2) I’m much better […]

Open Season: The Worst Kind of People

I don’t hate hunting. Deer hunting is cool. Rabbit hunting. Squirrel hunting. All fine. But there’s something about people hunting Safari-like animals that is incredibly sad and pathetic to me. Anyone who goes on a Safari Hunt (Safari Hunt? Is that the right term?) is a fucking prick, so I’m declaring Open Season on these assholes. If […]

Before Crying Michael Jordan there was Gay Michael Jordan and nobody appreciated it

Unless you’ve been living under a rock the past several months. You’ve seen this crying Michael Jordan meme. I kinda hated on it at first, but it’s definitely growing on me. I can’t help but laugh sometimes. Anyways, the crying Jordan may be wayyyyy popular now, but for the longest time I’ve been a much […]

Rough Time to be a Liberal Hoosier Fan

I’m too young to actually remember Bobby Knight coaching at Indiana University, but being a life-long Hoosier fan I love the guy. I really don’t know that much about him to be honest. But if your a guy who throws chairs onto the basketball court mid-game, I’m obviously gonna be a fan. Side Bar about […]

Here’s what Johnny Football’s future looks like

Johnny Football is going down a hell of a path. It’s wild stuff. I may even go as far to as say it’s been an emotional rollercoaster for him. But where will Johnny go next? More importantly, where will he end up? Because even if it’s not in football, I have a feeling that he […]

Quick Reminder Incase You Forgot

Tony Stewart. Legend. Smoke. Home Depot. #14. Ray Lewis. Legend. Linebacker. Ravens. Super Bowl. Brick. Weatherman. Loves Lamp. Wonders why everyone yelling. What do these three people have in common? They all killed a guy. Just wanted to remind everybody. On with your days.

NBA Jersey Ads will work

A lot of people are upset about the idea the NBA has to put advertisements on their uniforms. Some say it’s gonna turn the game into soccer (which is the most popular sport in history so not sure why that would be a bad thing). Personally, I think this is a fantastic idea. I mean.. soccer could […]

Ghost Prince is leading Minnesota sports to victory

Alright guys this is simple math right here. Prince died yesterday + [Prince = Minnesota (apparently?)] + Minnesota is in the Stanley Cup Playoffs + If anyone turns into a friendly ghost after death it’s gonna be Prince = Prince will friendly haunt the Minnesota Wild all the way to a Stanley Cup. GHOST PRINCE […]

I hope this is me someday

LEGENDARY Rumor has it that there is a man who once ran onto a soccer field, and has been steadily juking security guards out of their shoes to this day. This is that man. I’ve been waiting for a sporting event streaker/runner to get away for so long, but it never happens. This man has […]